"Not me! Monday"

It wasn't me that broke the egg onto the floor and left it until after dinner to clean up.

I also did NOT knock the pile of magazines I was going to thumb through and my daughters princess alarm clock into my filling bath tub when I went to get in.

I didn't just turn my fussing 22 month olds pillow over at 3am and tell him to go back to sleep instead of figuring out why his pillow was damp and get him a different one.

And, I would never giggle under my breath when my 3 year old falls off of his chair for the second time during the church service before asking him if he was OK. Never!